Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition. - Anonymous
I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
Don't worry, the spider is smaller than you. "Yeah. So is a grenade." - Anonymous
Don't worry, the spider is smaller than you. "Yeah. So is a grenade." Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes
What is the one machine at your local gym you should use to impress the ladies? The bank machine.
What is the one machine at your local gym you should use to impress the ladies? The bank machine. Anonymous
Moments Money Quotes
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If you don't cut the cake in pieces and just eat the whole cake, then you only had one piece. - Anonymous
If you don't cut the cake in pieces and just eat the whole cake, then you only had one piece. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Wise Quotes
I don't care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive. Anonymous
Life is the dash between the birth date and the passed away date. - Anonymous
Life is the dash between the birth date and the passed away date. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. - Anonymous
I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Statements
Want someone to stop texting you? Send back 'SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT." - Anonymous
Want someone to stop texting you? Send back 'SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT." Anonymous
Questions
"Don't worry you'll live." What are you a doctor or something? - Anonymous
"Don't worry you'll live." What are you a doctor or something? Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
In life, we must find happiness. I've been looking everywhere and still haven't found it. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
In life, we must find happiness. I've been looking everywhere and still haven't found it. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Life Quotes
My new year's resolution was to quit all my bad habits, but then it occurred to me - nobody likes a quitter. - Anonymous
My new year's resolution was to quit all my bad habits, but then it occurred to me - nobody likes a quitter. Anonymous
You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!'
You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!' Anonymous
Know Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. - Anonymous
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. Anonymous
Think Quotes Work Quotes
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. - Anonymous
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed.
I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

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