Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Christmas is a competition between who gives up first: Your feet or your wallet. - Anonymous
Christmas is a competition between who gives up first: Your feet or your wallet. Anonymous
Money Quotes Sayings
My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. - Anonymous
My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Think Quotes
To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that's even more human.
To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that's even more human. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
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I hope we're good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. - Anonymous
I hope we're good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Good Quotes People Quotes
Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that's confusing. - Anonymous
Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that's confusing. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! - Anonymous
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! Anonymous
Moments
Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find?
Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find? Anonymous
Questions Top 100
Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice. - Anonymous
Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice. Anonymous
Sayings
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake. - Anonymous
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
A fisherman who just caught a huge salmon reels the fish in, looks at the fish and says 'I am taking you for tonight's dinner!' The fish replies 'I already ate, can we go somewhere else?' Anonymous
Animals Eat Quotes
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day. - Anonymous
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Internet Lazy Quotes
Stop texting me in the middle of texting you... now I have to change my text. - Anonymous
Stop texting me in the middle of texting you... now I have to change my text. Anonymous
People Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed. - Anonymous
I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed. Anonymous
Good Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! - Anonymous
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! Anonymous
Time Quotes Work Quotes
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. - Anonymous
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Wise Quotes

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