Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and I find is ingredients. - Anonymous
I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and I find is ingredients. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Zoning out is your brain's way of saying "You look bored. Let me take you to a better place."
Zoning out is your brain's way of saying "You look bored. Let me take you to a better place." Anonymous
Think Quotes
Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry.
Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry. Anonymous
Drinking Never Quotes Stupid Quotes
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If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. - Anonymous
If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Questions
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games.
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games. Anonymous
Computers Life Quotes
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. Anonymous
Short Quotes TV Quotes Work Quotes
My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. - Anonymous
My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Yesterday I really wanted tacos, and now I'm eating tacos. Follow your dreams! - Anonymous
Yesterday I really wanted tacos, and now I'm eating tacos. Follow your dreams! Anonymous
Eat Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. - Anonymous
I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Statements
At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up. - Anonymous
At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. - Anonymous
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. Anonymous
Analogies Never Quotes Short Quotes
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. - Anonymous
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed and permanently set.
Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed and permanently set. Anonymous
Short Quotes Think Quotes
In grammar class the teacher asks her student 'When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'.
In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'. Anonymous
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