Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. - Anonymous
I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Top 100
You don't have to be crazy to hang out with me... I'll train you. - Anonymous
You don't have to be crazy to hang out with me... I'll train you. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. - Anonymous
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Short Quotes
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A UFO!? Quick, grab the worst camera we own.
A UFO!? Quick, grab the worst camera we own. Anonymous
Moments Short Quotes
Life is too short to worry about matching socks. - Anonymous
Life is too short to worry about matching socks. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
What's best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies.
What's best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Questions Short Quotes
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. - Anonymous
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes
I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing. - Anonymous
I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Statements
In grammar class the teacher asks her student 'When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'.
In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'. Anonymous
Top 100
Cleaning the house while your kids are still home is like shoveling.
Cleaning the house while your kids are still home is like shoveling while it's still snowing. Anonymous
Analogies
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. - Anonymous
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. Anonymous
Computers Short Quotes
Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face. - Anonymous
Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Life Quotes
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
One small decision can change your life! That's why I always let someone else make my decisions, that way if something goes wrong I have somebody to blame other than myself. Anonymous
Life Quotes
At the end of the day life should ask us "Are you sure you want to save the changes?" - Anonymous
At the end of the day life should ask us "Are you sure you want to save the changes?" Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions

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