Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number.
I am too lazy to be lazy.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.
Retirement is great, you get to be your own boss and tell yourself to do nothing all day.
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first.
Ultimate lazy moment: Watching the sunrise on TV because you're too lazy to get up and watch it for real.
I always help my wife out with housework such as washing the dishes and doing the laundry. She washes them, and I let them dry.
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!
Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite.
I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y".
I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed.
All of us light up a room, some when they enter, others when they leave.
There is no better moment to postpone something you don't want to do other than right now.
Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday.
It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supermarket express lane.
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
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