Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. - Anonymous
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
I've learned so much from my mistakes, I'm thinking of making a few more. - Anonymous
I've learned so much from my mistakes, I'm thinking of making a few more. Anonymous
Short Quotes
The only warning I take seriously these days is when my cell phone battery is low. Anonymous
Phone
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better.
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better. :)
Life: LOL, give me a second! Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing. - Anonymous
There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing. Anonymous
People Quotes Think Quotes Time Quotes
I really should do something with my life... maybe tomorrow. - Anonymous
I really should do something with my life... maybe tomorrow. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
You can teach a cat to do...
You can teach a cat to do anything that it wants to do. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Short Quotes
If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. - Anonymous
If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. Anonymous
Money Quotes People Quotes Sayings
Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions.
Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with.
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings
Dear LOL, thank you for being there for me all those times I never had something else to say. - Anonymous
Dear LOL, thank you for being there for me all those times I never had something else to say. Anonymous
Never Quotes Statements Time Quotes
I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does. - Anonymous
I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Dance like nobody is watching, because they are not, they are all checking their phones. - Anonymous
Dance like nobody is watching, because they are not, they are all checking their phones. Anonymous
Life Quotes People Quotes Phone
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia. Anonymous
Drinking Questions Stupid Quotes
In grammar class the teacher asks her student 'When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'.
In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'. Anonymous
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