Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

We're all mature, until someone pulls out some bubble wrap. - Anonymous

We're all mature, until someone pulls out some bubble wrap.

Short Quotes Top 100

Two mysterious people live in my house. "Somebody" and "Nobody." Somebody did it and nobody knows who. - Anonymous

Two mysterious people live in my house. "Somebody" and "Nobody." Somebody did it and nobody knows who.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Short Quotes Life Quotes Never Quotes

Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe. - Anonymous

Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe.

Short Quotes Love Quotes

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You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again. - Anonymous

You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again.

Short Quotes Top 100 Know Quotes

Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. - Anonymous

Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.

Short Quotes People Quotes

I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'

I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'

Moments Know Quotes People Quotes

It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them. - Anonymous

It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them.

Top 100 Work Quotes Sayings

I was told to check my attitude. I did, and it's still there.. it hasn't gone anywhere. What's the problem? - Anonymous

I was told to check my attitude. I did, and it's still there.. it hasn't gone anywhere. What's the problem?

Top 100 Witty Quotes

"Revenge" sounds so mean, that's why I prefer to call it "Returning the favor." - Anonymous

"Revenge" sounds so mean, that's why I prefer to call it "Returning the favor."

Short Quotes Sayings

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I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure! - Anonymous

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Wise Quotes Know Quotes Time Quotes

Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. - Anonymous

Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it.

Short Quotes Statements People Quotes

Friendship is like peeing on yourself.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Analogies Friend Quotes

Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. - Anonymous

Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious.

Short Quotes Sayings

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Sayings

Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected.

Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!

Analogies Love Quotes

Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

Short Quotes Sayings

Friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it's good just knowing they're there. - Anonymous

Friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it's good just knowing they're there.

Top 100 Know Quotes Good Quotes

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