Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

My fake plants died because I didn't pretend to water them. - Anonymous
My fake plants died because I didn't pretend to water them. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic. Anonymous
Trees.. they're all bark and no bite. - Anonymous
Trees.. they're all bark and no bite. Anonymous
Funny Tree Quotes Short Quotes
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When I see someone wearing a pink shirt I'm like, What are you hunting? Flamingos? Anonymous
On February 2nd the palm tree checked, and it saw its shadow... six more weeks of sunshine. Anonymous
Funny Tree Quotes
I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. - Anonymous
I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. Anonymous
Life Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
Just once I'd like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear "Monday has been cancelled," and then go back to sleep. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes Work Quotes
After a lot of research, scientists have concluded that the most vitamins are found in the pharmacy. - Anonymous
After a lot of research, scientists have concluded that the most vitamins are found in the pharmacy. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
I'm a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once. - Anonymous
I'm a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
Whoever said "Out of sight, out of mind" never had a spider disappear in their bedroom. - Anonymous
Whoever said "Out of sight, out of mind" never had a spider disappear in their bedroom. Anonymous
Sayings
My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes. - Anonymous
My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes. Anonymous
Facebook Friend Quotes Short Quotes
Life isn't measured by the number of breaths you take.
Life isn't measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the number of moments that take your breath away. Anonymous
Life Quotes Moments Top 100
Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. - Anonymous
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. Anonymous
People Quotes
Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape. - Anonymous
Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

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