Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off. - Anonymous
Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off. Anonymous
Money Quotes Stupid Quotes
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect. - Anonymous
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I just spent half an hour looking for my phone in the car, using the flashlight on my phone. Anonymous
Phone
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! - Anonymous
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! - Anonymous
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! Anonymous
Moments
If people were meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters. - Anonymous
If people were meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters. Anonymous
Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but I'm still going to keep looking. - Anonymous
Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but I'm still going to keep looking. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. - Anonymous
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. Anonymous
People Quotes Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. - Anonymous
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes
If you know something will go wrong and you do everything to stop it from happening, then something else will go wrong. - Anonymous
If you know something will go wrong and you do everything to stop it from happening, then something else will go wrong. Anonymous
Sayings
I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so. - Anonymous
I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. - Anonymous
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. Anonymous
Questions
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study.
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Moments Statements
Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee. - Anonymous
Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work. Anonymous
Phone Stupid Quotes Work Quotes

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