Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face! - Anonymous

Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face! Anonymous

Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. - Anonymous

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. Anonymous

Money Quotes People Quotes Sayings

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Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes

Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!

Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better! Anonymous

Animals Eat Quotes Good Quotes

They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?

They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug? Anonymous

Love Quotes Money Quotes Top 100

My advice is to never listen to any advice, not even this one. - Anonymous

My advice is to never listen to any advice, not even this one. Anonymous

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Wise Quotes

The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'

The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Anonymous

Marriage Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!

The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does! Anonymous

Know Quotes Life Quotes Phone

The only relationship I have is with my Wi-Fi. We have a connection. - Anonymous

The only relationship I have is with my Wi-Fi. We have a connection. Anonymous

Computers Love Quotes People Quotes

You have Facebook? Yup. You have Whatsapp? Yup. You have love? Forgot to install it. - Anonymous

You have Facebook? Yup. You have Whatsapp? Yup. You have love? Forgot to install it. Anonymous

Facebook Love Quotes Top 100

Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. - Anonymous

Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes People Quotes Short Quotes

Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply it by 9 and subtract 1. Now close your eyes. It's dark isn't it? - Anonymous

Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply it by 9 and subtract 1. Now close your eyes. It's dark isn't it? Anonymous

Math Quotes Think Quotes

Life always has it's ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy. Anonymous

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. - Anonymous

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. Anonymous

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Think Quotes

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Sorry I can't come today. My sister's friend's mother's grandpa's brother's grandson's uncle's fish died, and it was tragic. - Anonymous

Sorry I can't come today. My sister's friend's mother's grandpa's brother's grandson's uncle's fish died, and it was tragic. Anonymous

I want to sleep but my brain won't stop talking to itself. Anonymous

Short Quotes Sleep Quotes Think Quotes

I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.

I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Eat Quotes

Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday.

Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Statements

A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.

A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I'm hungry again. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Short Quotes

I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. - Anonymous

I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Top 100

I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years. - Anonymous

I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years. Anonymous

Life Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100

4 out 3 people struggle with math. - Anonymous

4 out 3 people struggle with math. Anonymous

Math Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

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