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I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. - Anonymous

I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal.

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Stop crying, Monday will be over soon.

Stop crying, Monday will be over soon.

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Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing! - Anonymous

Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing!

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The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest. - Anonymous

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

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Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday. - Anonymous

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday.

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Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us. - Anonymous

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.

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Can we start the weekend again? I wasn't ready.

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson

Simpsons

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Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? - Edgar Bergen

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

Edgar Bergen

Never Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

Albert Einstein

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Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. - Anonymous

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

Know Quotes People Quotes Stupid Quotes

When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! - Anonymous

When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!

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I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

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If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'

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I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.

Steven Alexander Wright

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I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.

I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Life Quotes Time Quotes

If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter. - John Gotti

If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.

John Gotti

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Working in a team means spending half your time convincing the others that your idea is better than theirs. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Working in a team means spending half your time convincing the others that your idea is better than theirs.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Time Quotes Work Quotes

After (M)onday and (T)uesday comes WTF ! - Anonymous

After (M)onday and (T)uesday comes WTF !

Sayings Short Quotes Work Quotes

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

Beer Quotes Drinking Life Quotes

The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.

The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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