Anonymous Quote

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead.

Relax, it's the weekend... just don't blink or it will be all over.

Tried going out with my girlfriend but by the time she finished putting on her makeup the weekend was over.

Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing!

I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.

If Monday had a face... I would punch it.

Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.

I wanted to make a clever chemistry joke, but the best ones argon.

If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave.