Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" Anonymous
Animals Top 100
Age only matters if you are a cheese.
Age only matters if you are a cheese. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I love ordering things online because when they arrive it's like a present from me to me. - Anonymous
I love ordering things online because when they arrive it's like a present from me to me. Anonymous
Love Quotes Sayings Top 100
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I'm not sure how long my body can handle this "getting out of bed early in the morning" nonsense. - Anonymous
I'm not sure how long my body can handle this "getting out of bed early in the morning" nonsense. Anonymous
Work Quotes
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is. - Anonymous
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Life Quotes
It's alright if you don't agree with me... I can't force you to be right. - Anonymous
It's alright if you don't agree with me... I can't force you to be right. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? - Anonymous
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? Anonymous
Love Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying. Anonymous
Short Quotes Wise Quotes
How can you make sure you never miss your target? Shoot first, and whatever you hit, call it the target.
How can you make sure you never miss your target? Shoot first, and whatever you hit, call it the target. Anonymous
Never Quotes Sayings Top 100
I'd walk thought fire for my best friend. Well, not fire because that's dangerous.
I'd walk through fire for my best friend. Well, not fire because that's dangerous. But a super humid room... well not too humid, because you know... my hair. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Know Quotes
I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status.
I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Computers
Zoning out is your brain's way of saying "You look bored. Let me take you to a better place."
Zoning out is your brain's way of saying "You look bored. Let me take you to a better place." Anonymous
Think Quotes
If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. - Anonymous
If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Questions
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. - Anonymous
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Work Quotes
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. - Anonymous
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Short Quotes

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