I might wake up early and do some exercise, or I might win the lotto, the odds are the same.
He who wakes up early, yawns all day long.
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with ONLY a loaf of bread are three billion to one.
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.
I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.
New year resolutions you can actually keep!
Skip more classes in school.
Call in sick at work more.
Go shopping more often.
Eat more unhealthy food like fries and burgers.
Drink more pop cans instead of freshly squeezing healthy fruits.
Do less exercise and watch more TV.
Your mind needs exercise just as much as your body does, that's why I think of jogging every day.
I get enough exercise just by pushing my luck!
I wake up looking better every day, but today I'm exaggerating.
When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31.
Please God, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me.
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat.
Work is just something I'm doing until I win the lottery.
Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym.
Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day.
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough.
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!
I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge.
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day.
I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run.
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