Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

That annoying moment when you're texting someone and auto-correct decides to join the conversation. Anonymous
Moments
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. - Anonymous
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes Love Quotes
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
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God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face.
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face. Anonymous
Life Quotes Top 100
Never run away when you see a bear, unless you know you can beat some of the other runners.
Never run away when you see a bear, unless you know you can beat some of the other runners. Anonymous
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. - Anonymous
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Short Quotes
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly. Anonymous
Internet Top 100
You and I are really more than friends. We're like a really small gang. - Anonymous
You and I are really more than friends. We're like a really small gang. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Prescribed laughter
My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too many people were crying from laughter so it's no longer available. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Minimum wage is like work enthusiasm, it disappears quickly. - Anonymous
Minimum wage is like work enthusiasm, it disappears quickly. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes
Ironing boards are surf boards that quit before achieving their dream. Don't be an ironing board. - Anonymous
Ironing boards are surf boards that quit before achieving their dream. Don't be an ironing board. Anonymous
Life Quotes
I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved. - Anonymous
I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved. Anonymous
Math Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
I made a huge to do list for today. I just can't figure out who's going to do it.
I made a huge to do list for today. I just can't figure out who's going to do it. Anonymous
Sayings
There's nothing better than good friend, except for a good friend with chocolate.
There's nothing better than a good friend, except for a good friend with chocolate. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Good Quotes
We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.
We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack. Anonymous
Life Quotes Love Quotes Short Quotes

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