Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I love my computer because all my friends live inside it! - Anonymous
I love my computer because all my friends live inside it! Anonymous
Computers Friend Quotes Short Quotes
Minimum wage is like work enthusiasm, it disappears quickly. - Anonymous
Minimum wage is like work enthusiasm, it disappears quickly. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes
The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat. It's watching what other people eat. Anonymous
Eat Quotes
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Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes TV Quotes
But doctor, where is the umbilical cord? New technology, it's wireless. - Anonymous
But doctor, where is the umbilical cord? New technology, it's wireless. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
There's nothing better than good friend, except for a good friend with chocolate.
There's nothing better than a good friend, except for a good friend with chocolate. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Good Quotes
I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen. - Anonymous
I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen. Anonymous
Top 100
Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house. - Anonymous
Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house. Anonymous
Love Quotes
Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living. - Anonymous
Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.
A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Life Quotes
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning. - Anonymous
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest. - Anonymous
The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I only want one thing from fake people: distance. - Anonymous
I only want one thing from fake people: distance. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly. Anonymous
Internet Top 100
I don't understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free. - Anonymous
I don't understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100

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