Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Life Quotes
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly. Anonymous
Internet Top 100
You call it nagging, I call it 'listen to what I said the first time!' - Anonymous
You call it nagging, I call it 'listen to what I said the first time!' Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Time Quotes
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If only my teeth were as white as my legs. - Anonymous
If only my teeth were as white as my legs. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. - Anonymous
I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? - Anonymous
If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? Anonymous
Questions Sayings Short Quotes
My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. - Anonymous
My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. Anonymous
Work Quotes
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. - Anonymous
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us. - Anonymous
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes
Research has shown that laughing for two minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog. So now I'm sitting in the park laughing at all the joggers. - Anonymous
Research has shown that laughing for two minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog. So now I'm sitting in the park laughing at all the joggers. Anonymous
Top 100 Work Quotes
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. - Anonymous
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes
If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be. - Anonymous
If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Love Quotes Top 100
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year.
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Yesterday my husband thought he saw a cockroach in the kitchen. He sprayed and cleaned everything thoroughly. Today I'm putting the cockroach in the bathroom. Anonymous
Wife Quotes
No matter how bad it gets I'm always rich when I go to the dollar store. - Anonymous
No matter how bad it gets I'm always rich when I go to the dollar store. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes

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