Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

A zooology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness. - Anonymous
A zooology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness. Anonymous
Animals
No matter how smart you are you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid.
No matter how smart you are you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid. Anonymous
Never Quotes Sayings Stupid Quotes
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't like the thought of being gone so long!
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't like the thought of being gone so long! Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry! - Anonymous
In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry! Anonymous
Eat Quotes Love Quotes Sayings
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. - Anonymous
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. - Anonymous
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
Sometime you meet such a prince that you'd rather marry the horse. - Anonymous
Sometime you meet such a prince that you'd rather marry the horse. Anonymous
Marriage Quotes Short Quotes
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. - Anonymous
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes
He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!"
He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this sidewalk is icy!" Anonymous
Love Quotes Stupid Quotes
On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic. - Anonymous
On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes
I'm super lazy today. It's like normal lazy but I'm wearing a cape. - Anonymous
I'm super lazy today. It's like normal lazy but I'm wearing a cape. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
"Don't worry you'll live." What are you a doctor or something? - Anonymous
"Don't worry you'll live." What are you a doctor or something? Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study.
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Moments Statements
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Anonymous
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. - Anonymous
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes

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