Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training? Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Short Quotes
By the power vested in me by Facebook, I now pronounce you unfriended and restricted. You may now kiss my butt. Anonymous
Facebook
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You can't run through a campground. You can only "ran," because it's past tents. Anonymous
Sayings
I don't have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights. Anonymous
Short Quotes Witty Quotes
I'm dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with. Anonymous
Sayings
Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
All my bills say "Outstanding." I guess I am good to go. - Anonymous
All my bills say "Outstanding." I guess I am good to go. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes
Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I'm ducking so it hits someone else. - Anonymous
Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I'm ducking so it hits someone else. Anonymous
Life Quotes
Q: How did you vote this year?
A: With a mask and gloves.
Q: And what are you hoping for?
A: That I don't get infected.
Q: No I mean what do you hope will change after your vote?
A: My mask and gloves.
Q: So what do you think the results will be?
A: Some will be positive, some negative. Anonymous
Questions
They say money doesn't solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine. Anonymous
Money Quotes
Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!! - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!! Anonymous
Never Quotes Short Quotes
Me: I am so glad I saved all this money. Me again: It's time to spend it, you know you want to. - Anonymous
Me: I am so glad I saved all this money. Me again: It's time to spend it, you know you want to. Anonymous
Money Quotes

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