Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up. Anonymous

Life Quotes Short Quotes

My kid asked me why a corn field is not full of popcorn after a lightning strike. I don't know either. Anonymous

I often wonder who Pete is, and why we do things for his sake. Anonymous

Questions Short Quotes

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There's a fine line between saying too much and saying too little. I walk that line like a drunk down at the circus. Anonymous

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it. Anonymous

One day I'll do amazing things. Today I'll be satisfied if I don't spill food on my lap. Anonymous

Eat Quotes

Facebook: because time isn't going to pass on it's own. Anonymous

Facebook Short Quotes

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it's time to fall asleep. Anonymous

Short Quotes Sleep Quotes

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado. Anonymous

Let the world say you are crazy, then you are free to do what you want. Anonymous

Short Quotes World Quotes

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad! Anonymous

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic. Anonymous

When a telemarketer calls, give the phone to the nearest child and tell them it's Santa on the phone! Anonymous

Trees.. they're all bark and no bite. Anonymous

Funny Tree Quotes Short Quotes

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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