Anonymous Funny Quotes

Home / Authors / Anonymous / Page 10

A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

$I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved. - Anonymous$

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved. Anonymous

Math Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. - Anonymous

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. Anonymous

People Quotes Sayings Top 100

Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah. - Anonymous

Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah. Anonymous

Animals Never Quotes Short Quotes

I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. - Anonymous

I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Top 100

My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. - Anonymous

My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

I know the voices in my head aren't real..... but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome!

I know the voices in my head aren't real..... but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome! Anonymous

Know Quotes Sayings Top 100

If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! - Anonymous

If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! Anonymous

Facebook Life Quotes

How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost? - Anonymous

How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost? Anonymous

Man Quotes Questions Short Quotes

The secret to happiness is not to do what makes you happy, it's to be happy doing what you're already doing.

The secret to happiness is not to do what makes you happy, it's to be happy doing what you're already doing. Anonymous

Happy Quotes Sayings

$Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. - Anonymous$

Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. Anonymous

Life Quotes Math Quotes Top 100

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera. - Anonymous

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera. Anonymous

Sayings Top 100

I've made it from the bed to the couch. There's no stopping me now. - Anonymous

I've made it from the bed to the couch. There's no stopping me now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'

The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Anonymous

Marriage Quotes Short Quotes

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth. Anonymous

If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. - Anonymous

If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. Anonymous

Facebook Life Quotes Work Quotes

I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog.

I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Think Quotes

I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. - Anonymous

I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. Anonymous

Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. - Anonymous

Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. Anonymous

Happy Quotes Life Quotes Stupid Quotes

Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? - Anonymous

Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? Anonymous

Questions Short Quotes

I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took me four days, but whatever. Anonymous

Short Quotes Sleep Quotes

I hate when people ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, I don't even know what I'm doing today. - Anonymous

I hate when people ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, I don't even know what I'm doing today. Anonymous

Know Quotes Life Quotes People Quotes

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave. - Anonymous

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave. Anonymous

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. - Anonymous

My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. Anonymous

Analogies Never Quotes Short Quotes

What if there was no Google? Good question.. I'll have to Google it. Anonymous

Questions Short Quotes