Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing. - Anonymous
I'm not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
Kids, I don't know if our ceiling is the best ceiling... but it's definitely up there. - Anonymous
Kids, I don't know if our ceiling is the best ceiling... but it's definitely up there. Anonymous
Know Quotes Stupid Quotes
A misty day does not signify a cloudy day, it signifies frizzy hair.
A misty day does not signify a cloudy day, it signifies frizzy hair. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
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Why was the rabbit chasing the frog? Because the frog kept calling out "riaabit.. riabbit.." Anonymous
Questions
Every time I have my picture taken I get hungry because I hear 'cheese' so I start to think of a nice cheese sandwich. - Anonymous
Every time I have my picture taken I get hungry because I hear 'cheese' so I start to think of a nice cheese sandwich. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Think Quotes Time Quotes
Don't invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed. - Anonymous
Don't invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed. Anonymous
Sayings
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers. - Anonymous
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers. Anonymous
Animals Questions Short Quotes
Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X. - Anonymous
Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X. Anonymous
Math Quotes Wise Quotes
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. Anonymous
Short Quotes TV Quotes Work Quotes
Husband: I am a grown man, stop mothering me. Also husband: Have you seen my keys? Have you seen my wallet? Where did we park? I don't have clean underwear. Anonymous
Life Quotes Marriage Quotes
Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I'm done with work. Anonymous
Short Quotes Time Quotes Work Quotes
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games.
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games. Anonymous
Computers Life Quotes
Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light. - Anonymous
Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light. Anonymous
Moments
Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. Anonymous
Know Quotes Marriage Quotes Wife Quotes
Do you ever feel like your body's "check engine" light is on but you're like "nah, I'll be fine"? Anonymous

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