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A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

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The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.
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How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one. - Anonymous
How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one. Anonymous
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Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it. Anonymous
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I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent. - Anonymous
I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent. Anonymous
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Today I was a hero. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle. - Anonymous
Today I was a hero. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle. Anonymous
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Life's biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I don't want to get out of bed. - Anonymous
Life's biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I don't want to get out of bed. Anonymous
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Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute. - Anonymous
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Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase. Anonymous
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Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
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Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. Dave Barry
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In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is bacteria. - Anonymous
In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is bacteria. Anonymous
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What is the difference between having a cold beer and going to the bathroom? About 35 minutes. Anonymous
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I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year.
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
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Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer. Anonymous
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If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. - Anonymous
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Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living. - Anonymous
Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living. Anonymous
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Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me. Anonymous
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The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
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I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong. - Charles M. Schulz
I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong. Charles M. Schulz
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