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Two mysterious people live in my house. "Somebody" and "Nobody." Somebody did it and nobody knows who. - Anonymous

Two mysterious people live in my house. "Somebody" and "Nobody." Somebody did it and nobody knows who.

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I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does. - Anonymous

I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Anonymous

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. - Anonymous

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Anonymous

I want to change my name on Facebook to "Nobody," so when I see someone posting something stupid I can Like their post and it will say "Nobody likes this." - Anonymous

I want to change my name on Facebook to "Nobody," so when I see someone posting something stupid I can Like their post and it will say "Nobody likes this."

Anonymous

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. - Anonymous

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue.

Anonymous

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You just can't live a full life on an empty stomach. - Anonymous

You just can't live a full life on an empty stomach.

Anonymous

I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes. - Anonymous

I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Anonymous

Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. - Anonymous

Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor.

Anonymous

I can't decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest. - Anonymous

I can't decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Anonymous

You can trust your dog to guard your house.

You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.

Anonymous

Ever since it started snowing my husband is standing in front of the window and watching.

Ever since it started snowing my husband is standing in front of the window and watching. If the snow gets much worse, I might let him inside the house.

Anonymous

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Cleaning the house while your kids are still home is like shoveling.

Cleaning the house while your kids are still home is like shoveling while it's still snowing.

Anonymous

In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.

In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.

Anonymous

Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.

Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.

Anonymous

For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.

For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.

Anonymous

Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house. - Anonymous

Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.

Anonymous

Sharks are not so bad... If a stranger came into my house wearing only a bathing suit, I'd probably get angry too. - Anonymous

Sharks are not so bad... If a stranger came into my house wearing only a bathing suit, I'd probably get angry too.

Anonymous

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow. - Anonymous

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Anonymous

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. - Anonymous

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here.

Anonymous

They say "don't try this at home" so I'm coming over to your house to try it. - Anonymous

They say "don't try this at home" so I'm coming over to your house to try it.

Anonymous

I'm stuck between "I need to save money" and "You only live once." - Anonymous

I'm stuck between "I need to save money" and "You only live once."

Anonymous

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