An adult is a person who no longer grows in height, but instead grows in length and width.
More Quotes by Anonymous
Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.
I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing.
I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge.
You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink.
I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don't think being an adult is going to work for me.
I followed a diet but it didn't follow me back, so I unfollowed it.
I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.
So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.
My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.
Every time we try to eat healthy along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday and ruins it for us.
Childhood injuries: Fell off my bike, fell out of a tree, twisted my ankle. Adult injuries: Slept wrong, sat down too long, sneezed too hard.
I'm old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway.
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.
My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museum.
I don't know how to act my age because I've never been this old before.
Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old.
Growing up is amazing, until you get old!
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.
CoolFunnyQuotes.com © 2019