Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I hate it when people text "Call me." I'm going to start calling people and as soon as they answer I'll say "text me," then hang up. - Anonymous
I hate it when people text "Call me." I'm going to start calling people and as soon as they answer I'll say "text me," then hang up. Anonymous
People Quotes Statements
Did a cartwheel the other day, thinking it was like riding a bike. It's not. - Anonymous
Did a cartwheel the other day, thinking it was like riding a bike. It's not. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I eat cake because it's someone's birthday somewhere today. - Anonymous
I eat cake because it's someone's birthday somewhere today. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
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Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. - Anonymous
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. Anonymous
Analogies Money Quotes Short Quotes
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. - Anonymous
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Work Quotes
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. - Anonymous
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. Anonymous
Life Quotes People Quotes Phone
The alphabet begins with ABC, numbers begin with 123, music begins with do-re-mi, and friendship begins with you and me.
The alphabet begins with ABC, numbers begin with 123, music begins with do-re-mi, and friendship begins with you and me. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Top 100
Life is a pretty cheezy game, but at least it has good graphics. - Anonymous
Life is a pretty cheezy game, but at least it has good graphics. Anonymous
Computers Good Quotes Life Quotes
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better! Anonymous
Animals Eat Quotes Good Quotes
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. - Anonymous
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Stupid Quotes
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! - Anonymous
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! Anonymous
Life Quotes Love Quotes People Quotes
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face! - Anonymous
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face! Anonymous
Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes
What do I do for a living? I breathe in and out. - Anonymous
What do I do for a living? I breathe in and out. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Isn't it funny how red white and blue represent freedom, unless they're flashing behind you? - Anonymous
Isn't it funny how red white and blue represent freedom, unless they're flashing behind you? Anonymous
Questions Sayings
I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. - Anonymous
I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. Anonymous
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