Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours?
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Funny Tree Quotes
Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money. - Anonymous
Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes
Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet. - Anonymous
Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet. Anonymous
Internet Life Quotes
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Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I'm ducking so it hits someone else. - Anonymous
Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I'm ducking so it hits someone else. Anonymous
Life Quotes
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Don't wake me up! I'm studying. - Anonymous
Don't wake me up! I'm studying. Anonymous
Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
Friendship is like peeing on yourself.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. Anonymous
Analogies Friend Quotes Top 100
I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
That moment you're thankful for Coronavirus social distancing rules because you just ate some garlic. Anonymous
Eat Quotes
And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly. - Anonymous
And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes
A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. - Anonymous
A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. Anonymous
Math Quotes Wise Quotes
Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons? Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
My body has absorbed so much soap, sanitizer and disinfectant, that now when I pee it cleans the toilet. - Anonymous
My body has absorbed so much soap, sanitizer and disinfectant, that now when I pee it cleans the toilet. Anonymous
Q: How did you vote this year?
A: With a mask and gloves.
Q: And what are you hoping for?
A: That I don't get infected.
Q: No I mean what do you hope will change after your vote?
A: My mask and gloves.
Q: So what do you think the results will be?
A: Some will be positive, some negative. Anonymous
Questions
They say money doesn't solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine. Anonymous
Money Quotes

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