Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. - Anonymous
Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100
I'm not stubborn, my way is just better than yours. Anonymous
Know Quotes Short Quotes
Don't worry, the spider is smaller than you. "Yeah. So is a grenade." - Anonymous
Don't worry, the spider is smaller than you. "Yeah. So is a grenade." Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes
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If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. - Anonymous
If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
I know I'm a handful, but that's why you have two hands.
I know I'm a handful, but that's why you have two hands. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Sayings
Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I think I may need professional help... A chef, a butler and a maid should be enough. Anonymous
Sayings Think Quotes
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch. - Anonymous
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes
If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? - Anonymous
If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? Anonymous
Questions Sayings Short Quotes
I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels. - Anonymous
I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels. Anonymous
Friend Quotes
Today I saw a woman talking to her cat, she really thought the cat understood. I told my dog when I got home... we both had a good laugh. - Anonymous
Today I saw a woman talking to her cat, she really thought the cat understood. I told my dog when I got home... we both had a good laugh. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Dog Quotes
One of the benefits of being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas, no make-up, and look like crap and I won't judge you. Anonymous
Friend Quotes
You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night. Anonymous
Life Quotes
I think it's clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like. - Anonymous
I think it's clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like. Anonymous
Statements
Would you believe my neighbor was knocking on my door at 2:30AM this morning? Luckily, I was still up playing bagpipes. - Anonymous
Would you believe my neighbor was knocking on my door at 2:30AM this morning? Luckily, I was still up playing bagpipes. Anonymous
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