Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired. - Anonymous
I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone. - Anonymous
I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone. Anonymous
People Quotes Phone
Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time. - Anonymous
Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time. Anonymous
Money Quotes Statements Time Quotes
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If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. - Anonymous
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. Anonymous
Life Quotes People Quotes Phone
If I had just one hour left to live, I'd spend it in Math class... it never ends. - Anonymous
If I had just one hour left to live, I'd spend it in Math class... it never ends. Anonymous
Life Quotes Math Quotes
Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double. - Anonymous
Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Short Quotes
Happy New Year! Here's to another year of binge eating, Facebook surfing, and Netflix marathons. Anonymous
Facebook
Kids: How come the closet is completely full of toilet paper? Me: We're getting 3 cats, we have to pad all the walls in the house. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes
If every day is a gift, then today I got socks. - Anonymous
If every day is a gift, then today I got socks. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I'm the kind of crazy you weren't warned about because no one knew this level existed. - Anonymous
I'm the kind of crazy you weren't warned about because no one knew this level existed. Anonymous
Life Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. - Anonymous
If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. - Anonymous
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. Anonymous
Never Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
I'm not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing. - Anonymous
I'm not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. Anonymous
Short Quotes
When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver. - Anonymous
When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver. Anonymous
People Quotes Sayings Sleep Quotes

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