I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.
More Quotes by Anonymous
He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
When you fall, I will be there to catch you - With love, the floor.
I didn't fall, I'm just spending some quality time with the floor.
Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels.
I've always wanted to turn around in an executive chair and say "I've been expecting you."
Alcohol doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean... against tables, chairs and walls.
I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at the floor, and think "I'd tap that."
Friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it's good just knowing they're there.
I haven't tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor.. so I'm sure I wouldn't like Yoga.
Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%.
It takes real skills to choke on air, fall up the stairs and trip over nothing. I have those skills.
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