My advice is to never listen to any advice, not even this one.
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears. Sigmund Freud
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog. Anonymous
Of course I talk to myself... sometimes I need expert advice. Anonymous
I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. Anonymous
My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me." Anonymous
You call it nagging, I call it 'listen to what I said the first time!' Anonymous
Instead of LOL why don't you try LOLWKASF: Laughing Out Loud While Keeping A Straight Face. Anonymous
You laugh because I'm different........... I laugh cause I just farted! Anonymous
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room. Woody Allen
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. Anonymous
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. Henny Youngman
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories... Steven Alexander Wright
It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too, and the day before that. Anonymous
Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon. CoolFunnyQuotes.com