I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones... that's why it's called a "cell" phone. Anonymous
What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.' Anonymous
How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness. Anonymous
Dance like nobody is watching, because they are not, they are all checking their phones. Anonymous
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work. Anonymous
I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone. Anonymous
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" Anonymous
I just spent half an hour looking for my phone in the car, using the flashlight on my phone. Anonymous
To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that's even more human. Anonymous
Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected! Anonymous
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. Anonymous