Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day. - Anonymous
Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Life Quotes
A good mood like is like a balloon, one prick is all it takes to ruin it. - Anonymous
A good mood like is like a balloon, one prick is all it takes to ruin it. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. - Anonymous
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
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I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.' Anonymous
Know Quotes Moments People Quotes
I just got off a flight that crossed through five time zones. Does that make me a time traveler? - Anonymous
I just got off a flight that crossed through five time zones. Does that make me a time traveler? Anonymous
Questions Time Quotes
If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor. - Anonymous
If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. - Anonymous
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Short Quotes
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies.
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Why do dentists use more anesthetic for longer procedures? So you won't be able to run away when it's time to pay the bill. - Anonymous
Why do dentists use more anesthetic for longer procedures? So you won't be able to run away when it's time to pay the bill. Anonymous
Questions Time Quotes Top 100
I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. - Anonymous
I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. Anonymous
Know Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. - Anonymous
Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Friend Quotes Sayings
I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge. - Anonymous
I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. - Anonymous
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes

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