Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me. - Anonymous
If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad! - Anonymous
I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad! Anonymous
Questions Sayings Short Quotes
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does! Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Phone
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Side by side or miles apart real friends are always close to the heart. - Anonymous
Side by side or miles apart real friends are always close to the heart. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Love Quotes Short Quotes
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. - Anonymous
Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes
What's your favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills. Anonymous
Money Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. - Anonymous
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Wise Quotes
What great energy, intelligence, and magnificent beautiful eyes...
What great energy, intelligence, and magnificent beautiful eyes... But enough about me, how are you doing? Anonymous
People Quotes
Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think "Wow, my house looks awesome!" - Anonymous
Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think "Wow, my house looks awesome!" Anonymous
Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day.
Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.
For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes TV Quotes
Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
Smile today, tomorrow could be worse. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
Why was the rabbit chasing the frog? Because the frog kept calling out "riaabit.. riabbit.." Anonymous
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