Money Quotes

Them: Money doesn't bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Minimum wage is like work enthusiasm, it disappears quickly.

What's your favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills.

They say money doesn't bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it for themselves.

Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled.

One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less than my wife!

I would've never imaged going into a bank wearing a mask and asking the teller for money.

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account?

I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house.

Please God, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me.

I'm a Nillionaire. I have little to no money!

No matter how bad it gets I'm always rich when I go to the dollar store.

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

What is the one machine at your local gym you should use to impress the ladies? The bank machine.