Anonymous Quote

Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.

I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.

I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.

When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.

My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead.

I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing.

It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already.

I know I'm a handful, but that's why you have two hands.

My diet for today: 1% food, 99% Halloween candy.

I'm on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

I followed a diet but it didn't follow me back, so I unfollowed it.