How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness.
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.
I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone.
Hmmm this text message is a little too harsh, I'll add LOL at the end.
How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice?
I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones... that's why it's called a "cell" phone.
I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever.
Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Intelligence is chasing me, but I'm beating it so far.
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.
John Gotti
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.
Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite.
It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase all doubt.
What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!
No matter how smart you are you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid.
Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.
Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
A relationship without trust is like a cell phone with no service, all you can do is play games.
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them.
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