Funny Animal Quotes

If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.

I love you so much I'd fight a bear for you. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu... But a care bear, I'd definitely fight a care bear for you.

You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.

When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog, like I'm a blackjack dealer...

I'm not bored of being quarantined, last night I even struck up a conversation with a spider. Turns out he's a web designer.

Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah.

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear.

Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!

In spring birds return from their tropical vacation. Six months later they regret their decision and go back.

How was the dog's day? Ruff.

What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself.