The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.
Steven Alexander Wright
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn't even know they knew how to knit.
Anonymous
In spring birds return from their tropical vacation. Six months later they regret their decision and go back.
A fisherman who just caught a huge salmon reels the fish in, looks at the fish and says 'I am taking you for tonight's dinner!' The fish replies 'I already ate, can we go somewhere else?'
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Being a beaver is nice, if you're hungry you just eat a piece of your home.
The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following.
CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees
David Letterman
Why was the rabbit chasing the frog? Because the frog kept calling out "riaabit.. riabbit.."
I don't care when people honk at me, but when geese do, I get out of the way!
The best way to show a giraffe your love is to knit a scarf for it.
A zooology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness.
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers.
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
A horse is dangerous at both ends, and uncomfortable in the middle.
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
Lily Tomlin
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service.
