Funny Animal Quotes

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What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.' - Anonymous
What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.' Anonymous
Phone Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
A fisherman who just caught a huge salmon reels the fish in, looks at the fish and says 'I am taking you for tonight's dinner!' The fish replies 'I already ate, can we go somewhere else?' Anonymous
Eat Quotes
The only thing you have to fear is fear itself... and spiders.
The only thing you have to fear is fear itself... and spiders. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours?
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Funny Tree Quotes
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees

David Letterman

Funny Tree Quotes Stupid Quotes
When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog, like I'm a blackjack dealer... Anonymous
I'm not bored of being quarantined, last night I even struck up a conversation with a spider. Turns out he's a web designer. Anonymous
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

Jack Handey

Eat Quotes Famous Quotes People Quotes
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service.
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service. Anonymous
Dog Quotes
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. Lily Tomlin
Short Quotes
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

A. Whitney Brown

I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog.
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Think Quotes Top 100
How does the healthy dog bark? Ruff Ruff.
How does the cold dog bark ? Scarf Scarf.
How does the confused dog bark? Wutf? Wutf?
 Anonymous
Dog Quotes Questions Top 100
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