Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

When I find it, I don't need it. When I need it, I can't find it. - Anonymous
When I find it, I don't need it. When I need it, I can't find it. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I think it's clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like. - Anonymous
I think it's clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like. Anonymous
Statements
Would you believe my neighbor was knocking on my door at 2:30AM this morning? Luckily, I was still up playing bagpipes. - Anonymous
Would you believe my neighbor was knocking on my door at 2:30AM this morning? Luckily, I was still up playing bagpipes. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
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As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. - Anonymous
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night. Anonymous
Life Quotes
Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face. - Anonymous
Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face. Anonymous
Sayings
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" - Anonymous
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" Anonymous
Phone Top 100
If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much.
If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much. Anonymous
Life Quotes People Quotes Top 100
Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. - Anonymous
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! - Anonymous
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way! Anonymous
Moments
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. - Anonymous
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. Anonymous
Short Quotes Witty Quotes
Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.
Give me your photo so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. - Anonymous
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Do you ever go out, and then something happens ...
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Questions Think Quotes Top 100

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