Anonymous Funny Quotes
A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.
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If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.
Anonymous
Want someone to stop texting you? Send back 'SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT."
Anonymous
Be kind to people, and if that's too much to ask for then just be weird to people. It's the least you can do.
Anonymous
One day you're 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you're 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.
Anonymous
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!
Anonymous
According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.
Anonymous