I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say.
You know you are lazy when you get excited about cancelling your plans.Anonymous
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.Anonymous
You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths. Steven Alexander Wright
Friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it's good just knowing they're there.Anonymous
Dear Diamond, we all know who is really a girl's best friend. Sincerely yours, Chocolate Cake.Anonymous
I hate mosquitoes. I mean, I know I am delicious, but I don't give out free samples.Anonymous
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep.Anonymous
Don't mess with me, I know Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Kung Fu and 20 other dangerous words.Anonymous
I hate when people ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, I don't even know what I'm doing today.Anonymous
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!Anonymous
If you know how many cupcakes I'm holding behind my back I'll give you both of them.Anonymous
We are going to be best friends forever... besides you already know too much.Anonymous
I'm glad I don't have to hunt my own food, I don't even know where sandwiches live.Anonymous
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