Top 100 Funny Quotes

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I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y".

I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y". Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes

Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find?

Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find? Anonymous

Questions

Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. Anonymous

Animals Witty Quotes

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What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" Anonymous

Animals

Everyone wants your happiness. Don't let them take it!! - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Everyone wants your happiness. Don't let them take it!! Anonymous

Happy Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.

When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner. Anonymous

Love Quotes Marriage Quotes

I love making friends. I usually prefer to make them out of plaster and give them funny looking hats. Anonymous

Friend Quotes

When I saw the monkeys at the zoo it reminded me of watching political debates on TV. Anonymous

TV Quotes

I always intended to pay for my sins, but I could never afford it. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

I always intended to pay for my sins, but I could never afford it. Anonymous

Money Quotes Short Quotes

Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red! Anonymous

Questions

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