Jacques Deval Quote

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God loved the birds and invented trees. Man loved the birds and invented cages.

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Animals Funny Tree Quotes Man Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

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It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird. - Anonymous

It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird. Anonymous

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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

Jack Handey

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The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees

David Letterman

Animals Funny Tree Quotes Stupid Quotes

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin

Life Quotes Man Quotes Short Quotes

God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face.

God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face. Anonymous

Life Quotes Top 100

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous. Albert Einstein

Famous Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. - Anonymous

Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. Anonymous

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Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. - Anonymous

Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes Top 100

The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. Steven Alexander Wright

Animals Funny Tree Quotes People Quotes

Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river. - Anonymous

Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river. Anonymous

Animals Sayings Short Quotes

What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours?

What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Funny Tree Quotes

I don't care when people honk at me, but when geese do, I get out of the way! CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Animals People Quotes Short Quotes

Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. - Anonymous

Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. - Dave Barry

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. Dave Barry

Animals Dog Quotes

I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say.

Ronnie Shakes

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The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following.

The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Never stand between a dog and the fire hydrant.

Never stand between a dog and the fire hydrant.

John Peer

Animals Dog Quotes Never Quotes

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. Benjamin Franklin

Money Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

Why can't cats work on the computer? They get too distracted chasing the mouse around.

Why can't cats work on the computer? They get too distracted chasing the mouse around. Anonymous

Animals Cat Quotes Computers

I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status.

I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. Anonymous

Animals Cat Quotes Computers

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