John Peer Quote

To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service.

Anonymous

Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog.

Anonymous

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear.

Dave Barry

If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.

Anonymous

I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.

Anonymous

For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.

Anonymous

My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting.

Anonymous

How was the dog's day? Ruff.

Anonymous

I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog.

Anonymous

I don't care when people honk at me, but when geese do, I get out of the way!

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Two fleas are coming out of a bar when one asks the other 'Do we take a dog or do we walk home?'

Anonymous

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Groucho Marx

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.

Steven Alexander Wright

The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

God loved the birds and invented trees. Man loved the birds and invented cages.

Jacques Deval

Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees

David Letterman

The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.

Steven Alexander Wright

If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

How does the healthy dog bark? Ruff Ruff.
How does the cold dog bark ? Scarf Scarf.
How does the confused dog bark? Wutf? Wutf?

Anonymous

You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.

Anonymous