Funny Animal Quotes

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Cats, dogs, and most animals have a magical way of being funny and cute without even trying. If you're an animal lover you will love these.

I named my dog "5 Miles," so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned. Anonymous
Dog Quotes
Today I saw a woman talking to her cat, she really thought the cat understood. I told my dog when I got home... we both had a good laugh. - Anonymous
Today I saw a woman talking to her cat, she really thought the cat understood. I told my dog when I got home... we both had a good laugh. Anonymous
Cat Quotes Dog Quotes
Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. - Anonymous
Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Witty Quotes
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. - Dave Barry
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. Dave Barry
Dog Quotes
What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.' - Anonymous
What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.' Anonymous
Phone Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better! Anonymous
Eat Quotes Good Quotes
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn't even know they knew how to knit. - Anonymous
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn't even know they knew how to knit. Anonymous
Know Quotes
What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump. - Anonymous
What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump. Anonymous
Questions Top 100
I'm not bored of being quarantined, last night I even struck up a conversation with a spider. Turns out he's a web designer. Anonymous
Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first. - Anonymous
Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first. Anonymous
Dog Quotes
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Anonymous
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. Anonymous
Top 100
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours?
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Funny Tree Quotes
In spring birds return from their tropical vacation. Six months later they regret their decision and go back. - Anonymous
In spring birds return from their tropical vacation. Six months later they regret their decision and go back. Anonymous
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