A zooology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness.
Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. Mark Twain
I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen
Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion. Anger: The emotion that puts your fist in motion. Lesson: Don't be afraid or angry and you won't have to run and fight. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't like the thought of being gone so long! Anonymous
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.' Anonymous
Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it. Anonymous
I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding. Anonymous
Bought a talking parrot today and taught him to say "Help, I've been turned into a parrot." Anonymous
I love you so much I'd fight a bear for you. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu... But a care bear, I'd definitely fight a care bear for you. Anonymous
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers. Anonymous
In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
You're riding a horse full speed, and there's a giraffe on your left and a lion chasing you from behind, so what do you do? Get off the carousel! Anonymous
Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah. Anonymous
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
When I saw the monkeys at the zoo it reminded me of watching political debates on TV. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump. Anonymous