Funny Moments

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You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you're full of energy and you can't wait to get to work? Me neither! - Anonymous

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you're full of energy and you can't wait to get to work? Me neither! Anonymous

Know Quotes Top 100 Work Quotes

Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. - Anonymous

Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. Anonymous

Funny Tree Quotes Short Quotes

Getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, 'Send one of my bags to New York, one to Los Angeles, and one to Miami.' She said, 'We can't do that!' I told her, 'You did it last week!'

Getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, 'Send one of my bags to New York, one to Los Angeles, and one to Miami.' She said, 'We can't do that!' I told her, 'You did it last week!' Henny Youngman

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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. - Erma Bombeck

All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. Erma Bombeck

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment. - Anonymous

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment. Anonymous

Life Quotes Love Quotes

I'll do the stupid thing first and then you shy people follow . - Frank Zappa

I'll do the stupid thing first and then you shy people follow . Frank Zappa

People Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

Better moment

There is no better moment to postpone something you don't want to do other than right now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Sayings

A girl called me once and said 'come over, nobody is home!' I went there and she was right, nobody was home!

A girl called me once and said "come over, nobody is home!" I went there and she was right, nobody was home! Anonymous

Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion.

Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion. Anonymous

Facebook Short Quotes

Sometimes I get road rage just pushing a shopping cart in a supermarket. - Anonymous

Sometimes I get road rage just pushing a shopping cart in a supermarket. Anonymous

That moment when you spell a word so wrong, even auto-correct is like "I've got nothing man." - Anonymous

That moment when you spell a word so wrong, even auto-correct is like "I've got nothing man." Anonymous

Don't make me laugh, I'm trying to be mad at you. - Anonymous

Don't make me laugh, I'm trying to be mad at you. Anonymous

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better. Anonymous

Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light. - Anonymous

Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light. Anonymous

Today I will live in the moment... unless that moment becomes unpleasant, in which case I'll take a nap. - Anonymous

Today I will live in the moment... unless that moment becomes unpleasant, in which case I'll take a nap. Anonymous

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That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don't know whether to get dressed or fake an illness. - Anonymous

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don't know whether to get dressed or fake an illness. Anonymous

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it. - Anonymous

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it. Anonymous

A UFO!? Quick, grab the worst camera we own.

A UFO!? Quick, grab the worst camera we own. Anonymous

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. Henny Youngman

Drinking Short Quotes

That annoying moment when you're texting someone and auto-correct decides to join the conversation. Anonymous

Beer together

Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it. Anonymous

Beer Quotes Drinking Short Quotes

I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Ladies and gentlemen thank you for flying xyz airlines, we hope you enjoyed your flight as much as we enjoyed taking your money. Please remember to take all your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among crew members. - Anonymous

Ladies and gentlemen thank you for flying xyz airlines, we hope you enjoyed your flight as much as we enjoyed taking your money. Please remember to take all your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among crew members. Anonymous

What is the one machine at your local gym you should use to impress the ladies? The bank machine.

What is the one machine at your local gym you should use to impress the ladies? The bank machine. Anonymous

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