The surest sign that there's intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, is that it has never contacted us.
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein
It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it. Sam Levenson
I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.
No matter how smart you are you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid. Anonymous
Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. George Burns
Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework. Anonymous
If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave. Anonymous
At the end of the day life should ask us "Are you sure you want to save the changes?" Anonymous
Life's biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I don't want to get out of bed. Anonymous
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. Anonymous
When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door, that's how they work. Anonymous
Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits. Anonymous
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge? CoolFunnyQuotes.com
My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn't be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn't be beauty, so the world needs you after all. Anonymous
What great energy, intelligence, and magnificent beautiful eyes... But enough about me, how are you doing? Anonymous
When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they're not it.
Once you can accept the universe as being something expanding into an infinite nothing which is something, wearing stripes with plaid is easy. Albert Einstein