Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump. Anonymous

Animals Questions Top 100

Be bold, be italic, but never regular. Anonymous

Life Quotes Never Quotes Short Quotes

I would've never imaged going into a bank wearing a mask and asking the teller for money. Anonymous

Money Quotes

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Sorry I'm late, I got here as soon as I wanted to. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

When you're thinking that I'm thinking of you, I'm thinking you're thinking of me. Anonymous

Life Quotes People Quotes Think Quotes

Laughter is like a windshield wiper, it doesn't stop the rain but allows us to keep going. Anonymous

Sayings

Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of your ears. Anonymous

Stupid Quotes

Each year in the USA, 16 people are attacked by sharks and 6000 by goats . We don't need shark week, we need goat week. Anonymous

TV Quotes

When I saw the monkeys at the zoo it reminded me of watching political debates on TV. Anonymous

TV Quotes Top 100

It doesn't matter how low the dollar will go, I will always bend down and pick it up. Anonymous

Money Quotes Sayings

I'm a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes

Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you. Anonymous

Work Quotes

My four moods: I'm too old for doing that. I'm too tired for doing that. I'm too sober for doing that. I don't have time for doing that. Anonymous

Time Quotes

Me: I am so glad I saved all this money. Me again: It's time to spend it, you know you want to. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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