Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency notify:"I put "Doctor." - Anonymous
In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency notify:"I put "Doctor." Anonymous
Witty Quotes
I've always wanted to turn around in an executive chair and say "I've been expecting you." - Anonymous
I've always wanted to turn around in an executive chair and say "I've been expecting you." Anonymous
Statements Work Quotes
No one will ever be as entertained by us as us. - Anonymous
No one will ever be as entertained by us as us. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. - Anonymous
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. Anonymous
Know Quotes Love Quotes Stupid Quotes
My husband and I are doing a workshop. He works and I'll shop. - Anonymous
My husband and I are doing a workshop. He works and I'll shop. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
The only exercise I've done this month is running... out of money! Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Money Quotes Short Quotes
He who wakes up early, yawns all day long.
He who wakes up early, yawns all day long. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before. Anonymous
Life Quotes Statements Top 100
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. - Anonymous
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes Top 100
I'm always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. - Anonymous
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. Anonymous
Top 100 Wise Quotes
How do you go to work? Forced! No, I mean how do you arrive there? Depressed. - Anonymous
How do you go to work? Forced! No, I mean how do you arrive there? Depressed. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
I don't want to adult today, I just want to dog. I'll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Life Quotes
Smile like a monkey with a new banana. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes

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