Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. - Anonymous
Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. Anonymous
Love Quotes
I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y".
I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y". Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I wish that all of my enemies had three cars parked in front of their house. An ambulance, fire truck and police car. - Anonymous
I wish that all of my enemies had three cars parked in front of their house. An ambulance, fire truck and police car. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. - Anonymous
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. - Anonymous
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? - Anonymous
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? Anonymous
Love Quotes Questions Short Quotes
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. - Anonymous
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. Anonymous
Sayings
I'm slowly becoming an adult... please make it stop. - Anonymous
I'm slowly becoming an adult... please make it stop. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? - Anonymous
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
Could you please be as silent as the G in lasagna?
Could you please be as silent as the G in lasagna? Anonymous
People Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%. - Anonymous
Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
What I do when I see someone pretty is, I stare, I smile then when I get tired I put the mirror down.
What I do when I see someone pretty is, I stare, I smile then when I get tired I put the mirror down. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100
Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion.
Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion. Anonymous
Facebook Moments Short Quotes
Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. - Anonymous
Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100

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